Sweetheart
by Owlee
Summary: Renee left Bella and Charlie. Here's the story the way I imagine it happening, told from the point of view of 8 different people and Bella herself. They're moments, not a big story, mind you. (REVISED) Brief mentions of femslash as well as hinting towards a pairing.


3 Years Old – Sarah

Sarah stared at the wide brown eyes that stared up at her stomach, large now from her latest pregnancy. How could anyone leave such a sweet, little girl? She could hardly imagine what went through that woman's head as she left Charlie and her two – almost three – year old daughter. She had known that Renee had gone through post-partum depression, but she had stopped seeing her psychiatrist after Bella turned one, saying she had overcome it. Apparently, she just pushed it back far enough to function normally, but it finally got too much when Charlie mentioned maybe trying for another kid. It was reasonable – all his friends were either parents of more than one child or currently on the way to becoming that and Renee must've always known Charlie wanted a big family. But the mention of another child had apparently broken Renee's resolve to stay.

Sarah tried to be understanding. She really did. She had taken a course on psychology in high school and had the basic idea of what post-partum did to a woman, but when she saw this little, innocent girl, she could barely comprehend. And it was hard not to feel anger when she remembered the way Charlie looked when he showed up at their door with his little girl in his arms and a confused, pained look covering his face. So no matter how hard Sarah tried at forgiving Renee, she couldn't. She looked at her two little girls – terrors really, twins usually were from what she heard – and she felt this sadness that Bella wouldn't have a mother, not really. While she had no doubts Charlie would be an amazing father, she knew the question would come. Especially with them being so close to the Blacks.

She smiled at the little girl now. Bella was so very fascinated by her pregnancy. More so than the twins, even though he was their brother. They had remembered when Bella was a baby and no fun to play with and the thought of a new, little brother lost its excitement fast.

"Would you like to feel my stomach, sweetheart?" She saw those brown eyes get bigger if that was even possible before nodding fast.

Sarah bent down enough for the three year old to reach. Bella's tiny hands looked so small against her stomach.

"Is baby coming soon?" Bella asked in a tiny voice.

Sarah grinned and nodded. "I hope very soon. Then you can see him and you will grow up with him."

Bella gave a childish grin, before furrowing her brow in a cute manner. "I was a baby in a belly?"

"Yes, sweetheart. All babies start in mommy's bellies. They grow big until they are strong enough to become big kids like you."

"Mrs. Sarah? Do you love baby even though he isn't here?"

Sarah felt a small sense of apprehension that Bella's questions were going to get a lot tougher. She remembered when Renee had just left and Bella had cried for hours for her mommy, while Charlie went between anger and sadness at his missing wife for leaving him and Bella like that. He had hoped she'd come back after she worked it out of her system, but she felt her was finally giving up that hope. He had mentioned looking for a house on the reservation if he'd be welcome, so that Bella could grow up closer with her friends.

Sarah smoothed her face into a smile again. "Yes, Bella. I love my baby very much."

"Did my mommy love me?"

Sarah moved as quickly as her pregnant body would allow, to hug the small girl, "Yes, honey. Your mommy did love you. And I love you too."

Bella's eyes slid to the ground. "But my mommy left me."

Sarah sighed softly. Even though she was scrambling to find an answer, she was almost glad that Bella had came to her with this question rather than Charlie. He wouldn't of been able to come up with an answer to the question when he didn't have a clue on his own.

She looked directly into Bella's eyes. "Your mommy did love you so very much. But she didn't know how to deal with so much love inside of her. She got scared and she ran away. But don't doubt she loved you, because she tried so very hard to stay for you."

Sarah didn't like Renee. Sarah didn't know what was going through Renee's head. But she knew that no mother could not feel some love for their child and from what she knew of Post-partum, this was how she rationalized it in her mind. And Bella needed comfort.

Bella had her face contorted in a child like grimace of anger. But tears were building up in her eyes and Sarah knew, which she knew before even said the words, that Bella would never understand.

She hugged the girl tighter. "And I love you too. And so does Charlie, Billy, Sue, Harry, and all the others. And our little baby will love you too."

Bella mumbled something into Sarah's shoulder that she could barely understand.

"What was that, sweetie?"

Bella looked at Sarah with a tear streaked face. "I wish you were my real mommy."

Sarah felt the anger at Renee surface again, but she pushed it down hard to focus on the terrified little child in front of her. "I might not be your real mommy, but I'll be as good as. I will always be here for you and always love you, Isabella."

5 Years Old – Charlie

Charlie was now living on the reservation in a small house, not too far from the Blacks. Bella was over there almost every day, playing with the two year old Jacob and the twins when they needed an extra for their games. Leah and baby Seth came over sometimes and then Bella would drag Leah to play with what she called the whiney babies, but Bella had lost the ability to do so with Rachel and Rebecca since they spent so much time together.

Bella was still fascinated with Jacob. Charlie wasn't entirely sure whether those two would wind up just best friends or maybe something more in the future. While it was a kind of nice dream, he often pushed it to the back of his mind, not wanting to think of the days that he'd have to worry after Bella that way.

Bella's best friend right now was easily between Leah and Jacob. Rachel and Rebecca messed with her too much and were a bit too old to be best friends, but perfect age to take the role of big sisters. Charlie was so glad of this. He had worried that with Renee gone, Bella would not have all the chances she would with her around. Charlie knew he wasn't the most social of creatures and knew without Sarah and Sue he'd be lost with Bella. Potty training itself would have killed him.

This was the biggest hurdle they'd faced so far though. Bella starting kindergarten. Bella had been advanced for her age, growing up mainly with kids older than her and adults, other than Jake and Seth of course. But even though two had helped her towards her maturing, as when they were very little, Bella was often to be seen helping Sarah take care of them. Sarah had often mentioned to him how much of a little helper she was. One time, though, she told him she wondered if maybe Bella tried to help so much so that Sarah wouldn't leave like Renee did.

No matter how many times Charlie had spoken to Bella, she was still too young to understand it wasn't her fault Renee left.

Charlie knocked as he entered his daughter's room. She was standing, still in her pajamas, glaring at her new school clothes.

"Bella, honey, you have to get ready for school."

Bella's glare turned towards her father. "I don't wanna go. Jake'n'Seth aren't gonna be there and Leah, Rachel'n'Rebecca are in a higher grade."

Charlie sighed. He had known this was gonna be difficult. "Yes, sweetheart, but you can make new friends. And you will be able to play with Leah, Rebecca, and Rachel at recess and see Jake and Seth when you get home."

"But that is seven hours without Jake and Seth," She whined, pouting at her father. "I can't leave him like that! We have important stuff we have to do."

Charlie hid his smirk at that. Bella's idea of important stuff was quite different, normally involving forcing the boys into playing house – Bella always the mother, of course.

"Well, it will be two years till Jake can go to school and 3 for Seth. So you can't wait till they are ready to start school."

Bella huffed and plopped down on her bed. "It's not fair!"

Charlie moved and set down next to her. "Think about all the things you'll get to tell Jacob and Seth about school. And you'll get to learn to read and write. You'll be able to read Jacob and Seth even more stories now."

Bella peered up at Charlie, "Yeah, but I won't know anyone in the class."

Charlie sighed and ruffled Bella's hair, which she gave an indignant squeak to. "I think Jared will be there. You remember him?"

Bella wrinkled her nose. "Yes, but he's a boy with cooties."

This time Charlie had to seriously bite his tongue to keep from laughing. "And Jake and Seth aren't?"

Bella gave him a disgusted look, "Of course not, me and Leah make sure they take regular cootie shots."

"And what about me? Do I have cooties?"

Bella rolled her eyes, "Of course not, and neither does Uncle Billy or Uncle Harry. You're both grown ups. Only boys get cooties."

Charlie grinned at Bella before nudging her. "Then you must go to school so you can give all the boys their cootie shots, like you do for Jacob and Seth."

Bella sighed loudly. "I'm not getting out of this, am I, daddy?"

Charlie grinned like he always did when she called him daddy. "Nope, kiddo. I'm afraid you're stuck with this."

Bella stood up and shooed him out the door. "I have to get dressed then, go away."

The moment Charlie got out the door, he burst out laughing, hoping Bella didn't hear. It took a few moments before his grin died down and he smiled a little sadly. Even though she had to do this, he felt as this was the start to losing his little girl.

"Renee," he muttered to himself, "you missed the best chance of your life to see this little girl growing up."

Renee had sent a card and small gift every year on Bella's birthday, but never with a return address. And she never called to ask how Bella was. Charlie had no clue where the woman was or what she was doing. He tried not to think of her, but some days, like days like this, he could almost imagine what it'd be like if Renee had gotten better and hadn't left.

He felt a tug on his sleeve and he looked down to see his little girl dressed and ready. He smiled gruffly at her. "Come on, Bells, it's time to start school."

They rode the short ride to the school in relative silence. Charlie knew Bella still had some nerves and he was doing his best to give her space to work through them.

When they arrived at the elementary school, he walked her to her classroom. They were surrounded by mothers saying goodbye to their kids, some fathers with the mothers, but still. Bella bit her lip slightly. Charlie leaned down and hugged her tight.

"Listen here, kiddo. I know it's sometimes hard without your mom around, but I love you enough for both me and her. And you almost grew up with 5 parents. Me, Sarah, Billy, Sue, and Harry. I know it's not the same, but don't think you are loved any less than any of these kids. Just cause it's different, doesn't mean it's lesser."

Bella smiled softly at her dad. "You're the best daddy in the whole world."

Charlie suddenly had something in his eye.

Age 7 – Seth

Bella was his other big sister. She'd been around just as much as Leah had when he was little and played with him more too. She told him and Jake all sorts of stories. She didn't play tricks on him like Rachel and Rebecca and sometimes even Leah did. And she even managed to get Leah to stop being angry with him when he broke her favorite toy.

Yeah, Bella was great. And so was Jake. Jake was his best friend, even though he was a year older than Seth.

But now that he is four, he is losing both of them. Bella had been lost to that school two years ago and now it was Jakes turn.

"Hate school." He muttered to himself.

Bella giggled before nudging him. "You haven't even started it yet, and you already hate it. You aren't gonna set a very good example for Jake."

The 7 year old Bella loved school. She got to read all sorts of books and she had made friends in her class, even though her best friends were still Jake and Leah. Seth was her baby brother and Rachel and Rebecca were her big sisters of course.

Seth made an angry face. "It keeps taking everyone away from me."

Bella made a soft noise of understanding before touching his shoulder slightly. "It's not taking us away from you, Sethy. We're still here for you. We just have to go to school to learn things and you just have a year to start."

Seth pouted. "But it's a year all alone. And I'll be starting school with no one I know in my class."

"I did too, you know. And I didn't want to start without you guys either, I protested school until my dad explained to me why I had to go. But it's something that has to happen and you aren't losing us completely. You still will see us every evening and we'll tell you all about our days and we'll play like normal."

"Why can't I start school with Jake? I'm just a year younger, I bet I could do anything Jake can."

Bella hugged Seth with one arm. "Sethy, it's not you can't keep up, it's just the rules. It's not fair, but you'll start school soon enough. And you'll get to play with Jake at recess and everything."

Too Seth's embarrassment, he started to cry. Bella hugged him much tighter and with two arms now. "Don't worry Seth, we won't forget your or love you any less just 'cause we aren't here all day. And you'll get all the snacks to yourself and get to pick out all your own movies. No more watching Barbie movies 'cause of the twins."

Seth gave a watery grin. "And no more having to play house."

Bella stuck her tongue out at Seth. "Don't worry, we'll make up that time after school. You're not getting out of it so easy."

Seth pulled back from the hug. "Bella, you know you are like my sister right?"

Bella smiled, "Yes, and you are my annoying, little brother. And no school is going to change that."

Seth grinned bigger, "Teacher's pet."

Bella rolled her eyes, "Brat."

Age 10 – Billy

Billy stared at the casket with surprising emptiness.

He couldn't believe this had happened. It just wouldn't register in his mind that she was gone. Sarah, his Sarah, so full of life, so full of love, gone, in an instant.

Billy felt the emptiness give way to pain.

He turned at walked out of the funeral parlor. Sue had Jake and the girls right now. Jake was confused more than anything and the girls seemed to be stuck in the state of anger at the drunk driver.

Billy didn't feel anger. He just felt emptiness or pain.

Everyone had tried to help him, but how do you help something like this? His wife, the mother of his children was suddenly gone. He felt a lot more empathy for Charlie, losing Renee, even though the ways were so very different.

He found himself on the edge of the woods. They had always calmed him. He took long walks in them whenever he was upset, so it wasn't surprising he had wound up here. But he wasn't alone. He heard sniffling from behind a tree. He had a guess who it was, but he walked over to make sure.

"Bella?"

The 10 year old girl hadn't been able to make it into the funeral home. Charlie had apologized, but Billy felt sympathy for the girl – though Rachel and Rebecca were some angry with her, but the twins were angry with everyone.

Bella looked up at him, eyes so red and full of pain. "She promised she wouldn't leave me, Uncle Billy. Why did she leave me?"

Then he found his arms full of the young girl and he gave in to his pain and cried with her.

"Oh, Bella, honey, she didn't want to leave you. You know she didn't." He muttered into her hair.

Bella looked up at him, "I feel so angry at the driver and sad that she's gone and lost without her at the same time. And I feel angry with myself for being such a wreck when she was your wife and Jake and Rachel and Rebecca's mother."

Billy gave a sad smile. "She was as much your mother as theirs, you know that Bella. Don't feel bad for feeling so sad. We all are."

They stood hugging each other for awhile longer before Bella spoke up again.

"Why do things like this happen? It's not fair that good people get taken away by stupidity. My dad and you never drive drunk, why would anyone else risk a life like that?"

Billy softly sighed, "I've been asking myself that question since it happened. Bella, people don't always think about the consequences of their actions. And Sarah was just in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"It sucks. It sucks so bad." Her tears were building up again.

"Yeah, sweetie, it does."

Bella bit her lip. "Do you think the pain gets better?"

Billy placed a kiss in Bella's hair, "Yes, it does, sweetheart. With talking, with time, with remembering the good times. But it will hurt for awhile."

"The twins are so angry..."

Billy nodded. "They don't know how to deal with the pain, so they put it on the person they hold responsible... They miss their mom very much and once it settles in, they will need to talk about this just as much as we do. And Jake... Jake just doesn't know how to comprehend it. He's still too young in a way."

Bella tried to give Billy a brave smile, and while it appeared anything but happy, it gave Billy a small feeling of hope, "Well, I'll be strong for them like Sarah was strong for us. And I'll try to help them."

Billy ruffled Bella's hair, "You do that. And I will too. But if you ever need to be not strong, you can come to me or Charlie or even Jake and the twins to talk. You can't be strong for someone else if you don't take care of yourself, Bells."

Bella hugged Billy one more time, "You remember that too. And you'll get better. Aunt Sarah wouldn't want us sad over her forever."

Billy stared at the ten year old that had more logic than he did sometimes.

"You're right, sweetheart."

Age 11 ½ - Sue

Sue heard a small knock on her front door. She wasn't sure who it could be, since Leah was at a friend's for a sleepover, Seth was at Jake's, and Harry was at work. When she opened the door and found a 11 (and a half) year old brunette girl with a face redder than any tomatoes in her garden, she was slightly surprised.

"Bella? What are you doing here?"

Bella shuffled her feet. "Auntie Sue, I have a problem."

Sue moved out of the was and ushered the girl inside and to her kitchen table, "Does your dad know you are here, Bella?"

Bella looked at the ground and shook her head. "It's too embarrassing."

Sue sighed, before grabbing her cell to give Charlie a heads up. Sue had an idea what this was about. As the only female member of Bella's "family" that wasn't under 5 years older than Bella, it was easy to guess why Bella would come to her. If she was in the situation, she'd come too.

Sue looked at Bella now, "Did you start your period, honey?"

Bella's blush suddenly intensified and she looked everywhere but at Sue and nodded. It was quite a bit different from Leah's reaction which was anger at the fact it was happening to her. Of course, Leah's current stage in life is full of teenage angst and Sue was lucky enough that her daughter's period started late and right in the middle of it.

"Sweetheart, it's nothing to be embarrassed of. It's very natural. Now I'm guessing you need some pads?" Sue reached over and patted Bella's hand before taking her to the bathroom and giving her one and instructing how to use it. "If you need any help, tell me."

Bella took at least 10 minutes in the bathroom before coming out very red faced. "Thank you, Auntie Sue."

Sue just grinned softly. "Now was that so embarrassing?"

Bella nodded dramatically.

Sue snorted before hugging Bella. "Would you prefer I told your dad?"

Bella nodded again and Sue stuck her tongue out her.

"I wasn't expecting it to start so soon, Leah's began at 13, almost 14. But I'm glad you came to me, since you didn't want to go to Charlie."

Sue felt a small sadness erupt inside her. She knew that if Sarah hadn't been taken away, she'd of been the one Bella had gone too. She knew that Sarah had explained the facts about it to her when the twins had gotten hers. While Sue and Bella were very close, it still wasn't that mother-daughter bond that she and Sarah had shared.

Poor kid, Sue thought, she's had to lose two mothers in 8 years. Even though Renee wasn't much of a mother anyways.

Sue had never really forgiven Renee.

Sue hugged Bella again tight. "Hey, Bella, you know I love you, right? And you can come to talk to me about anything, especially if it's something you'd prefer not to share with your dad, or have me tell him."

Bella smiled softly, "I know, Auntie Sue, and I love you too. You're the closest thing to a mom I have left."

Bella's words echoed Sue's thoughts so closely that it surprised her.

She smiled at Bella, "Well, then, I guess I get to embarrass you as much as I do Seth and Leah. If you think I was bad before, wait till now!"

Bella giggled, "Thanks, Auntie Sue."

Sue softened her grin, "No problem, Bells."

Age 13 – Rachel and Rebecca

Rachel and Rebecca were 17 now. They were more rebellious than the typical teens and it kept Billy on his toes.

Truthfully, the twins had never gotten over the death of their mother.

Everything on the reservation reminded them of her.

And they were so very angry about it. They hated drinking and one of their many pastimes was pouring out all of Billy's liquor. They said it was disrespectful of their mother and it caused many rows between the three.

One of these rows is the reason that the twins wound up on the Swan's door step.

Rachel knocked and Bella opened the door almost immediately, "Billy called, come in."

Both of them huffed at the mention of their father.

They set down in the living room, just staring at each other for a few minutes.

Bella broke the ice, "It's not really fair to punish Billy for what the idiot did. You know he'd never drink and drive, even before what happened."

Rebecca scowled, "Still! The thought of him being able to consume that shit after what happened to Mom..."

Bella smile sadly, "I do understand. I get so angry when I hear my dad talk about drunk driving cases around here. It makes me wish they'd make this a dry part. But I know it's not really fair to those who take care not to hurt others. And Aunt Sarah wouldn't want you to fight with Uncle Billy."

Rachel sighed, but Rebecca scowled harder. Rachel was the one who spoke though, "I know she wouldn't it's just... hard. Being here. Without her. All of La Push reminds me of her, of the day we got the news, of the day of the funeral. I can't stand it sometimes."

Rebecca's scowl lessen but the anger in her words didn't ease, "And Dad makes it harder by doing exactly what that mother fucking, son of a bitch did. The guy wasn't even stone cold drunk, he was just slightly above the legal limit. He barely got any time."

Bella's lips pursed. She had been pissed about that too, the guy who killed the woman who was in all respects other than blood and name her mother. "I'm sure he doesn't mean to make it harder, guys."

"We know that.." Rachel said sadly, before a soft gleam came to her eyes. "Me and 'Becca are almost 18... And Bella can you keep a secret?"

Rebecca suddenly looked sharply at Rachel. Bella's eyes widened, but she nodded, "Of course."

"We plan on leaving La Push as soon as high school's over. I'm almost guaranteed a scholarship and 'Becca has a good chance. We've been saving our work money so we can move out as soon as possible."

Bella felt tears come to her eyes at the thought of the twins leaving. "You haven't told Billy?"

Rebecca shook her head, "No, of course not. He'd do everything in his power to stop us even though we are miserable here."

Bella reached forwards and hugged them both. "I can't say I don't understand why you are doing it, but I will miss you guys and I know Billy and Jake will too... But I think you need to tell them and soon. Losing you guys quickly isn't going to be good for them."

Rebecca's jaw clenched, "He won't stop us."

Bella turned a hard look to Rebecca, "If you explain it to him, he won't even truly try."

Rachel turned to her twin, "She's right you know. It's almost like what Renee did to Charlie all those years ago."

Now Rebecca's hard glare turned to her sister, "Don't compare this to what that woman did. She had no reason to do that, our mother never did."

"Rebecca..."

The angry girl let out a long sigh. "God. When did a thirteen year old get smarter than us?"

Rachel snorted slightly. "I'm pretty sure she's a certifiable genius. Of course, since she's our sister, we can take all credit."

Bella stuck her tongue out at them, before schooling her features. "So you'll tell?"

Rachel looked at Rebecca who rolled her eyes before nodding, "Okay, brat, we'll tell."

Bella smiled at them, "Thank you. I love you guys."

Rachel smiled while Rebecca muttered, "'Love you too, nut."

Age 15 – Leah

Despite the fact the year age difference, Bella had always been Leah's best friend. They'd grown up together and Leah knew Seth considered Bella just to be another sister. But Bella was Leah's best friend, and that meant everything.

When Leah was an angst-y teenager, Bella had been able to temper her out. She'd let her stay the night when her Mom got too mad at the crap Leah did. She'd talk about everything and give Leah the time to calm herself down.

Honestly, Bella was Leah's favorite person too.

So naturally, Bella would be the first person to talk to about her biggest secret ever.

Leah was more than slightly apprehensive. She had no clue how Bella'd react, they'd never discussed this sort of thing and so she had no basis on what could happen.

But Leah had to tell someone. And Bella had always been Leah's someone.

So that was why Leah was climbing the tree outside of Bella's window at 11 pm. And knocking on it incessantly until she saw a bleary eyed girl standing there, look as though she might push Leah out of the tree.

But, thankfully, she just opened the window and let Leah in.

"Its 11 p.m. On a school night. What do you want Leah?" She asked, tapping her foot. Charlie's room was on the ground floor and they'd learned he couldn't hear them without them screaming or jumping, so there was no worries about him coming up to check on the noises.

Leah suddenly looked sheepish, which confused Bella – sheepish was the last emotion to be related to the confident, older girl.

"I need to tell you something. And it's big. I couldn't wait any longer, I've been trying to get up the nerve for ages."

The annoyed expression disappeared from Bella's face almost immediately and she sat down and motioned for Leah to join her. Leah shook her head which just confused Bella even further.

"Please don't freak out," Leah started off, nervously. "Bella... I think I'm... gay."

Leah suddenly turned away.

Bella just stood and went and touched Leah softly on the shoulder. The other girl turned around to look at her. Her russet colored skin had a very obvious red tint to it.

"Think or know, Leah?"

Leah suddenly hugged Bella tight and started crying, "I know I am and I'm so very scared."

Bella hugged the tall girl back hard before bringing her back to her bed and sitting down. "Scared of what, Leah?"

"The reactions. It's a big taboo for most of these people, I know my dad doesn't like them. What if I lose my family over what I am."

Bella nudged Leah, "Then I'll just smack them all until they realize what idiots they are."

Leah didn't smile.

Bella sighed, "Leah, they're your family. They are going to accept you no matter what. I already know Seth and your mom will be fine with it. Your dad might be a little surprised at first, but you're his daughter, his little girl. He won't abandon you just 'cause you're gay."

Leah almost flinched at the word gay.

"And... what do you think?"

Bella smiled, "I think I am your best friend and just 'cause you like girls instead of guys, that won't change. You're still my Leah. My very best friend."

Leah hugged Bella again. Bella mentally sighed, since she knew her friend didn't usually hug, only when she was so very scared or upset she needed reassurance it's going to be okay.

"Listen, even if all turns to hell, I'll still be here for you. I know my dad would let you stay with us if I asked. But I really think that it's going to be okay, Leah. Don't worry."

Leah pulled back slightly and Bella took a deep breath at the look Leah was giving her. It was almost an awe, but filled with a love.

Bella wasn't sure exactly who moved forward but the two girls kissed very softly before Leah pulled away.

"I've gotta go, Bella... Thank you."

A few moments later, a shocked Bella came to, to find Leah slipping through the window and down her tree. By time Bella got to the window, she knew Leah wouldn't hear her.

Both girls didn't speak of the moment again.

But Bella didn't forget it. And neither did Leah.

Age 15 ½ - Harry

Bella stalked up the drive way, angrily toward the Clearwater's house. She paused momentarily as Sue exited the house carrying a frying pan.

Sue stopped at Bella, "Please excuse me, Bella, but I must leave before I hit my husband over the head with this."

Bella couldn't help but snort, mad as she was. "Don't worry, Auntie Sue, I'll hit him over the head with a figurative one."

Sue winked at Bella, "Thanks, sweetheart."

Sue returned to her angry walk and muttering.

Bella's anger was now twinged with amusement.

She entered the house to find her Uncle Harry sitting in his recliner looking surly and annoyed. He startled slightly at the sight of Bella, but quickly schooled his features.

"I suppose you're here to yell at me too."

Bella smirked, "Just some, Uncle Harry. I also promised Aunt Sue I'd hit you over the head with a imaginary frying pan. But mainly I'm here to find out why you sent your daughter crying to my door step over something she can't control."

Harry snorted, "Can't control. Bullshit. It's just a rebellious phase."

Bella almost saw red. But she calmed herself down. Yelling wasn't the way to deal with Harry – Sue did it with him enough he was practically immune to sense thrown at him that way.

"Rebellious phase? Which is why she showed up at my window at 11 p.m. one night, terrified to tell you. But I assured her that her father wouldn't be such a jerk to treat her this way. She was literally in tears that night, Harry, and this one too. I left my dad to console her so I could come over here and try to shake some sense into you."

Harry scowled, "It's not natural, Bella. It's not right."

Bella rolled her eyes. "Mr. Clearwater, please excuse my French, but fuck what society thinks is right, it's your daughter and you are supposed to love her whether she likes boys, girls, or freaking deer."

"Yeah? And what's your dad think about this, or does he even know what's going on? I can't exactly see him being approving of this."

Bella fought the urge to slap the older man. Reminding herself that violence is not the answer, no matter how much better it might make her feel, she continued. "My dad knows exactly what's going on. And while he said he doesn't understand it, if it was me, he'd fully support me, because I am his daughter and that's what he's supposed to do. She's still the same smart mouth, loyal, strong Leah. She just likes girls. She's always liked girls, you just didn't know it before."

Harry stared at Bella. "Why are you so involved in this, Bella? It's not really your issue."

Bella snorted, "Of course it's my issue. Leah is my best friend, and I consider you, Aunt Sue, and Seth my family. And family helps each other and does not judge each other. If you weren't family, I'd probably of just slapped you by now."

Harry stared at Bella a bit longer. "You're a lot like Sarah, you know? And Sue. It's like you have Sue's temper, but Sarah's reason, logic, and sweetness."

Bella smirked, "Well, I was raised by both of them. You know, you were there for most of it. And there for most of Leah's childhood too. You know. Your daughter. The one you threw out for being gay."

Harry flinched at the word gay.

Bella filed away the similar reactions. "You're the reason Leah is so afraid to be herself. She was terrified to tell _me _ of all people. She should've known I'd never judge her for something like that, but because of _you _she had to fear my response. She's your little girl, Uncle Harry. That didn't change just 'cause you found out she was gay."

Harry looked down. "Bells. Where'd you get this brain from? You're 15 years old, this should be the other way around."

Bella just ignored his sentence.

Harry sighed. "Okay, genius girl, how do I fix this?"

Now Bella smiled and hugged Uncle Harry before slapping him on the arm, "You go to my house and have a long talk with Leah about why you did what you did. Then you apologize to her and Sue for your behavior."

Harry grimaced, "I'm an awful, old codger, aren't I?"

Bella grinned, "Yeah, but at least you're an old dog that can learn new tricks."

Harry snorted, "Thanks, Bella."

Age 17 – Renee

Renee watched the teenager with the long brown hair from her car, hidden slightly behind a bush.

She was beautiful and so happy looking. Renee was glad she'd left Bella behind. She doubted she could've raised the girl to be that happy. She was messing around with an older Quiluete girl and two boys, laughing, and joking. She figured out that one of the boys was Sarah's and the other two were Sue's. Renee smiled to herself. Bella'd grown up with the two best women as role models.

It had been a bit of a shock to find out that Sarah had died 7 years ago, though. It must've been so hard on everyone. Renee had actually liked Sarah and had been a little jealous of her. She was so capable of being happy in this tiny town with just her kids and husband. Renee couldn't take just that no matter how much she tried. The doctors had all diagnosed her post partum depression, but Renee just thought it was depression in general. She'd loved her little girl, but knew she couldn't give her what she needed.

She'd sent her daughter birthday cards every year. And small gifts, from places she'd been. Renee still hadn't settled down with anyone yet, she hadn't stayed anywhere long enough to. She worked a job capable from computer and made enough money to fuel her travels.

Renee turned her attention back to the teens. She wondered about them, about whether Bella was dating anyone. About how she'd grown up. She'd checked public records and knew Bella had lived on the reservation since about a year after she left.

Honestly, Renee felt no guilt over leaving. It was honestly the best thing for all of them at the time.

She saw Charlie walk up to Bella and mess with her hair. This was the first time she'd seen Charlie since she started her Bella-watching. She was so curious about the daughter she'd gave birth to.

She wondered what Bella thought of her now, and she felt a tiny bit of remorse. The only thing she hated was the fact her daughter might hate her.

And it was fair if she did.

Completely fair.

Renee jumped as she heard her car door open and turned around ready to hit the person trying to jump her ride.

But she recognized the older woman. Sue hadn't changed much with age. The Native Americans kept their gorgeous looks for longer than Renee would. But you could see the laugh lines around her eyes and the way she carried herself different.

"You have a lot of nerve coming around here, Renee. I don't know how long you've been watching Bella, but you really have no right to do even that."

Renee expected this. The only one she thought had a chance at understanding her was Sarah and Sarah had died.

"I did what was best. Neither of them would've been happy with my around, always bringing down the mood. Charlie wouldn't of gotten the family like he wanted, Bella would've had a mother that acted more like a child and had no real role model. This way , she grew up with you and Sarah as her role models, both of which I admire so ver – "

Sue smacked her, "Honestly, you idiot bitch, I can't really think you believe this was the 'right thing'. You up and disappeared in the middle of the night. Do you know how many times Sarah, Charlie, Billy, Harry, and even me have had to face that girl's innocent brown eyes and hear her ask why her mommy didn't love her enough to stay. After she saw Jacob born and Seth born, after both Sarah and I had our second kids, she wondered how she was so bad that the idea of a second kid scared you so much you ran away. Charlie, _Charlie, _came to us crying so much because he didn't know how to take care of a little girl, he was so scared he'd do something wrong. That girl grew up with two mothers and Renee, you're right, thank God you weren't one of them.

"Sarah might've felt the slightest sympathy for you, but I didn't. If you had Post Partum still, you shouldn't of stopped going to the shrink, you should've tried for that little girl, for that man who has put up with more shit than you know."

Sue sighed and rested her head in her hands, "Fucks sake, Renee, what are you doing back here?"

Renee sighed, " I wanted to know. If she turned out happy. How she turned out. Please, don't doubt I loved her. I couldn't stay, I couldn't. I couldn't have another child, I couldn't face telling Charlie I couldn't stand the thought of another child when I could barely cope with the thought of the one we already had. Please, Sue, try to understand..."

Sue rubbed her head. "That's the problem. I do. But I've also seen the pain you put them through. And I can't forgive you for that. But that girl turned out amazing and maybe if you were here, she wouldn't of turned out that way. And we all knew before you even left, you'd never be truly satisfied with a life in a small town"

"What happened to Rachel and Rebecca? I haven't seen them around," Renee asked, shifting the conversation away from the things she didn't want to discuss.

Sue rolled her eyes, but allowed the subject to change, "La Push became too much for them after Sarah passed. When they turned 18, they got scholarships and got out of here. We knew beforehand, but only 'cause Bella talked them into telling. It was a hard 4 years for those girls. They couldn't let go of their anger and move on while they were here."

"Is Bella dating anyone? One of those boys perhaps?"

Sue snorted, "Seth, never, they've said so many times to each other that they are basically siblings. Jacob – that's Sarah's boy, Seth's mine – maybe at some point. She's kind of like a Goddess on Earth to him right now, but she's been that to him since he was little and she was helping Sarah feed him."

Renee smiled softly, "She seems a lot like Charlie and Sarah from what I can tell. Made for this small town life, she can be pleased with it in ways I never could."

Sue gave a reluctant nod, "She loves it. And she loves kids, you should've seen her with Seth. With Jake, she was still a bit too little to really help take care of him, but when Seth came along, she was constantly helping. I'm pretty sure she was more fascinated with the girl's brothers than the girls ever were."

"Can you tell me more about her? Please, Sue... I know I gave her up for all intents, but I just... I need to know."

Sue shrugged, "I'll tell you just so you know what you missed out on. Everyone says she got Sarah's logic and kindness and my temper. You should've seen her go off on Harry when he got upset with Leah being gay. But she also managed to reach him, whereas I stood back and threatened to hit him with a frying pan. I'm also pretty sure she's part of the reason Billy and Jake recovered so well from Sarah's death... The twins wouldn't let her in enough to help... And she is so embarrassed by some things she turns red as a tomato and it's hilarious. She came to me when she had her first period and could barely speak. And her humor, she's funny as hell – has been since she was a teeny thing. But honestly, what most people remember about her is how sweet she can be. How caring and loyal. I guess she kind of got the opposite of what you have."

Renee winced at the harsh words, but nodded anyways, "Thanks, Sue... Do you know what she thinks about me?"

Sue breathed a heavy breath, "She is kind of like Sarah. She is angry as hell for you leaving, but I have no doubt she'd forgive you if you asked, because of your reasons. Unlike me who wants to slap you repeatedly."

Both set in silence for a few minutes.

"Do you want to meet her, Renee?"

Renee shook her head. "I just wanted to know how she was... I might meet her later in life, but for now... I don't want to mess anything up."

Sue stared at Renee. "You've got some pretty low self esteem there, Renee. All your reasons fall on you not being good enough."

"I'm not though, am I? I wasn't made for the life that chose me, how many people can say that?" Renee tried not to start crying.

"You think I wanted to be a stay at home mom at first? That was always Sarah's dream, but until I stared into my darling, psycho Leah's eyes, I didn't want that. I wanted to work. But I couldn't, I had to stay with my daughter. I guess part of me can understand how that wouldn't keep you. Not when you didn't want any of it in the first place, not the pregnancy, not the marriage, nothing."

"I did love Charlie. I truly did, Sue."

"I know."

They elapsed into silence again.

Sue looked at Renee again. "When will you be back? Or do you have an email so I can update you on Bella's life"

Renee's eyes widened, "You'd do that? I thought you never would forgi –?

Sue laughed, "I don't. But I'm trying to do what Sarah would do. Plus possibly torture some more by knowing how amazing your daughter is."

Renee smiled, "You don't change, Sue. It's nice, a constant."

Sue rolled her eyes. "Give me your email, bitch, before I kick you out of your own car for being too sappy."

Renee snorted, "I hope Leah didn't get your temper or those teenage years would've drove Harry crazy."

Sue smirked, "Oh, they did."

Age 18 – Jacob

Bella had been one of his best friends since he was born. And from how his mother told him, Bella had loved him from before he was born. When his older sisters wouldn't play with him, Bella always would. Honestly, when he was young – and maybe just some now – he viewed her in the way some would view a goddess. Unattainable, but so perfect. But Bella walked on Earth and that made her even better. While Seth was his other best friend, Bella was the one he'd go to whenever he had a problem. Whenever he missed his mother. Seth had only been a year younger than Jake, but he still didn't know Sarah like Bella did. His dad had often said how much like Sarah Bella was.

So Bella was Jacob's vision of a perfect girl. And he'd been in love with her since before he could think about these things.

But Bella wasn't meant to be his – he and her had hashed this out ages ago, had kissed each other, and while it was an amazing kiss, Bella said she couldn't imagine dating him. Jacob had been hurt for awhile, but he eventually managed to get passed it and he and Bella were back on their usual terms.

Jake hadn't dated much – due to both Bella and having to take care of his dad. But he had finally managed to work up the courage to ask the girl he liked to prom and she said yes. Jake hadn't really thought this through, however, and was now a nervous wreck the night before prom. So he did what he always did when he was nervous. He went to talk to Bella.

Bella smiled as she opened the door – she'd honestly been expecting this, "Hey, Jacob, come in."

Jake shuffled in with a sheepish, embarrassed teenage boy look, "Hi, Bells."

She snickered at him. "Nervous about prom, Jake?"

Jacob felt shocked, though he realized later he shouldn't of been. Bella had always been able to tell what was going on. He shrugged, trying to fight off the blush and hoped Bella just thought he had a sunburn. "Yeah, I guess"

Bella grinned at him, "Well don't be. You know that Amber's liked you for awhile and you'll show her a good time regardless. You're a good guy, Jacob Black."

Jacob rolled his eyes at her, "Yeah, but what if I mess something up? Or she expects... _something._"

Bella blinked before blushing herself, "Jake, are you asking me what you should do if the girl wants to have sex with you?"

Jacob's eyes suddenly went to the ceiling and he blushed and shrugged – wanting to deny, but wanting help too.

Bella tried to keep her giggles to herself. "Well, if both you and she want to – and make sure you are absolutely certain that she does, don't just assume – then you take it slow and try not to hurt her. You'll be fine Jake, I doubt she's been with any guys yet either and if she has, they wouldn't of been much better than you. She probably has no expectations in that department if she wants it. But if you don't want it, just tell her you want to wait. Not that it's her, just you want to get to know her better – it's likely, if she's a good girl, this'll make her want you even more. Then you date her some more if you hit it off."

Bella's eyes suddenly went hard on Jake, "I know you're a good guy Jake, but even good guys can make mistakes. If you ever have the slightest feeling she wants to stop or not even start, be sure to make sure it's okay. You don't want to live with the feeling of causing that and she doesn't want to live through going through that."

Jacob nodded, though he knew he'd never do that to a girl. He'd grown up around more guys than girls and he knew he'd kill anyone who did it to Leah, Bella, Rebecca, or Rachel. He wouldn't do that to a girl. "And what about the... other stuff? What if I mess that up?"

Bella smiled, "You apologize and hope you didn't screw up to badly. All guys fuck up once in awhile, you just gotta make sure you make forgiving you worth it. But you're worth it. And she's lucky to have you."

Bella looked at him a bit longer. "You know, Aunt Sarah would be so proud of the man you've become. You're a good guy Jacob Black, and I'm glad I got to grow up with you. Your mother would be so very proud. She was from the day she was born."

Jacob hugged Bella tightly, thanking her for everything.

Age 19 - Bella

"I've know Rebecca since the day I was born. She was loud and crazy, but so loved and so loving. Her mother, Sarah, probably got more than few gray hairs because of her, but it was so worth it. Solomone, while I doubt you understand this yet, when you are part of a tribe, the whole tribe is your family. Just like Rebecca is my older sister and Jacob's and Leah's and Seth's. Just like she is Sarah's daughter and Billy's and in so many ways Sue's, Harry's and even my dad Charlie's. Sarah had told me so many times that my family was much bigger than I thought. Rebecca is going to make our family grow and I welcome Solomone to it. I hope he can keep up with the chaos, but if he can't, I'm sure one of us will help him out. Even if it's not by blood, or by name, Solomone, I welcome you as my brother-in –law. May you and my sister have a happy life."

Rebecca had started crying and so had Rachel. Solomone was smiling at her – not many had tried to be welcoming to him. She felt her father come up and wrap his arm around her and whisper in her ear "That was sweet, baby girl, real sweet." Bella grinned at him before stepping down from the platform to let the next person go.

Rebecca's wedding had come to a surprise to everyone except Rachel. No one had even known she was dating someone. And even Rachel admitted the newlyweds had gotten together fast. But it was a beautiful wedding and so obvious how much the two loved each other. And that's all that mattered to Bella. And the rest of their family saw it too, even if Billy wished his little girl had waited a bit longer.

Bella had grown up happy, even without her real mother. She honestly viewed Sarah and Sue has her mothers even if she had never called them that. Sue had admitted to Bella shortly after her 18th birthday that Renee has came to see her and the Sue was keeping her informed. She said the woman had made a huge mistake and was now realizing it and if Bella wanted to give her a chance it was up to her. So Bella had started emailing the woman regularly. Renee was very different from any of the women she knew. Even though her mother had been traveling independently and having a life many dreamed about, Bella saw her as weaker and less happy than Sue and Sarah ever were. Family gave you strength and Renee didn't truly have that – had chose not to have that actually.

Renee was fascinated by Bella though and Bella found herself telling her all about her days. About starting college and helping Rebecca plan a wedding. She'd even told Renee a bit about her life before. She never went to deep into her emotions, but she let Renee as far into her life as she could right now.

Charlie was apprehensive about the tentative relationship. He didn't want to see his little girl hurt again by her mother. It had been hard enough to face the 2 year old who couldn't understand why her mother wouldn't love her enough to stay. Sarah and Sue had helped him get her through that and taught Bella how to love deeper than he ever could on his own. His daughter was a truly amazing creature. She took the traits of all of her parents (even Charlie could admit it had been a group effort to raise all of their children – of course that probably saved them their sanity) and formed it into one girl. Bella was his little baby girl and would be forever

Billy never got over Sarah. She was the only woman he ever loved and without the support of his family he doubted he could've made it through it. Through the past few years, as he got sicker and lost the ability to walk, he came to rely on his family more than ever. Jake and Bella were his saving grace – Jake helping him to and from places and on the regular basis and Bella who cooked and cleaned and always leant a listening ear. He knew Sarah had loved Bella like one of their own and it shined in the young woman. He could see the pieces of Sarah left behind in her just as much as he could in Jacob, Rebecca, and Rachel.

Sue loved the girl since she was a tiny baby – even though she'd puked on Sue more than a few times. She loved her even more when the girl came to her daughters rescue when even she couldn't talk sense into Harry. The girl had given her a book on heart healthy recipes after Harry had a minor heart attack and was told he'd have to change his habits. And as much as Harry grumbled about it, she knew he appreciated it too. She had once heard Seth defiantly tell Jacob when he was little that he had two sisters too – Bella and Leah.

Harry was ashamed of how he acted towards Leah when she came out to him. He'd been a scared old ass and he took it out on her. He was thankful to Bella for coming and knocking some sense into him before Sue literally did. He watched as the girl grew up to be Seth's big sister. He loved the little white girl for helping his family in every way.

Sarah had loved Bella like a daughter till the day she died. She had gave birth two three beautiful children, but she claimed Bella as her own as soon as she'd asked. She'd watched the sweet girl be so very careful when playing with Jake when he was little and making Jake settle down with Seth. The girl had helped her many times when four children and two babies had gotten to be too much. When the drunk driver sped towards her, her last thoughts were about her children and how much she loved them. And of course that included Bella.

When Seth was little, he had been so confused about why he, Leah, and Bella didn't all live in the same house together, like Jake, Rachel, and Rebecca did. Leah and Bella were both his sisters and they were supposed to live together. It'd taken Leah calling him stupid, softly, before quietly explaining that Bella wasn't Mommy's and Daddy's daughter, so she wasn't actually his sister like Leah was. When Seth began to cry, Leah told him that Bella was his special sister, even if she wasn't his real sister. When Seth started school and had problems with bullies, it had been Leah and Bella who made them stop. And then they taught Seth to fight so he could take care of himself. Seth loved Leah and Bella equally as his sisters. And no one could tell him that Bella wasn't his.

Jacob's worship of Bella had finally died down to the relief of the entire family. And probably to his girlfriend too, though they'd not talked about it yet. Jake would tell Bella about everything, and she'd be the one he'd go to for advice. When he had to be strong for Billy, he'd talk to Bella for hours about how he was terrified to lose him like he'd lost Sarah. And Bella would tell him she was scared too, but they'd take good care of him and make sure he was okay. Bella had a special role in Jacob's life. While he'd loved and hero worshiped her for so many years she'd also been the one to help take care of him since he was little. She was his best friend and his mother's daughter. But she wasn't his sister. That'd be gross.

Bella was Leah's best friend and just that. The kiss they'd shared that night was never forgotten by Leah, but she never brought it up to Bella because she was afraid it'd change things if she recognized it for what it was. Leah admitted to herself that she had feelings beyond friendship for the girl, but she didn't know if it was simply because Bella was the first to accept her. So she shoved the feelings down and dated many girls when she went off to college. But Bella was still her first love and she couldn't exactly forget her when she was always there. Leah never regretted it though. Bella was her best friend. And that was enough.

Bella missed Sarah. She missed her so bad sometimes it hurt. She wanted her advice about Renee and Leah. She wanted to talk about how Billy's sickness made her feel, and how worried she was about Harry's heart. She just wanted to talk to Sarah. About anything and everything.

She loved all her family. And in a way, she'd been glad Renee left, looking back. She couldn't imagine her life a different way.


End file.
